Lord knows I have a drinking problem....I roll over every morning in my bed feeling for my bottle on the night stand to see if there is a drop left in it. If not I stumbled like a 110 year old woman to the refrig to find another bottle. God help Tinkerbell if she is in the path to the kitchen.
Then I unscrew the lid and ah my first drink of the morning. It is like no other! Is it my fault over a hundred years ago some man in Waco, Texas invented a drink he named Dr Pepper. Now fools like me all over this great nation are adicts.
Am I proud of it. No! Is there help for me? Probably not. I thought of joining AA but then I know me and my addictive personality I would feel bad for the others that have other drinking problems and the I would probably come home and hit the liqour cabinet. Well I don't really have a liqour cabinet but I do have a amour full of it but that is another story for another day. Has nothing to do with my problems right now.
You ask What is my problem right now that has got me drinking more? Well let me see if I can fill you in this morning without forgetting anything.
Number one is this freaking thing called Blogger. It wasn't going to be number one on my list tis morning but when I was getting ready to type my list for you I hit the longer key thingeee that says enter because I thought that would bring me to the next line and instead it published this page. Now why would hitting that button publish my stupid work before I am ready to publish it for the world to see.
I instantly screamed WHAT and grabbed my bottle. Tinkerbell jumped a foot from my desk and landed on the keyboard and hit all kinds of keys. Another swallow from the bottle.
Ok here I go again with my reasons. Well you know while I am on blogger I might as well get it all out. Here lately I can come on to my site and I have no friends on the sidebar. I mean 99 percent of the time you are not there. Sometimes u are and sometimes your not. Another drink.
Then last night I was suppose to be doing research for a book that heaven knows only if it will ever be written and I am thinking you know I need to try and make some of my post into one of those books that everyone does on Cutest Blog site and I kid you not if I had not had some restrain left I could of drank a dang six pack trying to do that very project. Let me tell you I sat here in front of this computer until after midnight and I still did not order a book of my pages. One time the book was 200 pages over their limit. I for the life of me could not figure out how to delete post so I go back in and make another one. Not an easy thing for me to do. Then they show me the results of that book. Well it was not in the freaking color I picked out for the jacket. So when I try to edit that it won't do it. Have you ever just wanted to throw your lap top clear across the room. Another drink!
After three long enduring hours and I don't know how many swallows I had four books made and none I mean none o them were what I was trying to make. God help me could I be that dumb. I closed the computer not even caring if I logged off. I was too busy trying to find another bottle.
Then I think ok I don't have a certain time any more to be up so I will try and research some of my material. Well I crawl in bed get all comfy with a half dozen pillows behind me and all of a sudden I am the one jumping a foot off the bed. Tiukerbell either half drunk herself or just old missed the bed when she jumped up and instead landed on the night stand. Knocked my lamp off on the floor and by the time I managed to get to the wall switch to see the damage there is Dr Pepper running on my pages of notes. Holy freaking whatever I run to the bathroom for a towel and almost break my toe because I hit it on the edge of the doorway.
Clean up that mess and go to bed. lol The heck with research.
Back to my list of things driving me drinking. You know I still have not sold my home yet in town. I have a nephew living there and I love him dearly but he can't afford it so I don't charge him the full rent. Well now that the sheriff's office thinks I am not healthy enough to work for them I can no longer keep letting him live there so cheap. Well me and him have been back and forth on the phone and emails trying to figure out what to do. He claims he can't come up with anymore money so he is talking about finding something else. Well believe me in this town he will not find anything near the size of my home and no where close to what he is paying now. So I get this email from him last night about he is going to have to finish the floor in the bathroom and then put a sink in the first chance he gets when he is off. Now when I read that there were not enough DP's in my house to calm me down. What does he freaking mean he has to finish putting in a bathroom floor and sink. What the heck does that mean. Where is the one that was there when he moved in.
More drinking!
Another problem I am having which I know it's all my fault but I can't be me. Does that make sense to any of you. Ever since I have found myself with out work I am like in a fog. I can't even keep up with you on here. My desk right now if you were to ask me for a pen to write with I am guessing it would take me ten minutes to find one. Right now I am looking at a Fat cat licking her paws and scratching the back of her ear all at the same time. There is a halff eaten Church's apple pie inside their bag under the cat. Mail piled up that needs to be either tossed in the trash or put God knows where. Books here, there and everywhere. Pictures of my kids and grandbabies that some are standing up others are laying down. My breakfast of peanut butter crackers and yes a Dr Pepper are in lying here somewhere. Oh and a package of cat treats for the fat cat.
Somewhere under all of this is a list of things I need to get done this week. More swallows.
Plus it is going to be 103 or more today and no rain. Another big swallow. hahahaha
Ok I will stop but believe me I could keep going with this drinking list until the cows come home. Another problem. The ranch next door and all their cows. lol
Sorry I have to leave you now some how today I need to find me in all this clutter and do something today besides drink. Now where the heck is my to do list?
Love to all
Maggie
22 comments:
Oh, I know what you mean!! But I was beginning to think I was the only one with this problem. It is the first thing I grab in the morning and the last at night. I do try to limit it to just two cans a day but sometimes I have more. Who would every have thought that Dr. P was so addicting? I have tried to go without but it doesn't last long - and the sad part is I love it cold with no ice - but I drink it even when it is hot!! Maybe we should start a Dr. P anonymous club -
Cheers....
Brenda
In my head I can see you dancin' and singin' "I'm a pepper, he's a pepper, she's a pepper, wouldn't you want to be a pepper too?"
Am I dating myself with knowing that jingle?
I'm addicted too but it's not Dr Pepper... My problem is H2O, that it's too readily available and I always have some in the Britta filter in the fridge and with this heat I've been drinking more that usual just to keep my inside cool. I run to the bathroom at least three times a night. It's ruining my sleep and I get up all tired every morning.
On top of that I like to drink a bottle of beer at least on really hot days. Does that make me a lush???
That dang Dr.Pepper has me at its mercy too. It is addictive! I try to cut down, so to supplement my thirst (like Julia) I "occasionally" substitute for a cold beer (or 2).
Hugs, Kim
Ah, Maggie! You are just the kind of person Walmart needs to be a greeter! You would cheer up all the people coming into the store that they would buy, and buy, and buy.
My mom used to drink Dr.Pepper. I like it okay, but water is the drink of choice for me, but I don't drink enough of it. I get up plenty during the night, already!
Have a good day!
Ok Maggie now I am going to start drinking I just tried leaving you a comment and of course it is in cyber space somewhere.
I was telling you that I wish I knew what advice to give you but I am laughing too hard at you this morning.
I think you have worked so hard all your life you don't know how to adjust to being at home. Sure you have been home this past year but you were in bed with your back now your up and around and feeling somewhat lost.
Maybe try something stronger than DP haha no I am joking
Take care
Tam
Maggie I just read this post to my husband and he ask me how far from us do you live in Texas. hahaha
He is still laughing at you!
Especially the part about God am I that dumb.
Your something else
Tam
Oh Maggie you made we laugh esp. when you said you can't even put up with us. I think that's what you said.
I drink Diet Coke......everyone esp. my Mom is always on my back about it. I also like McDonalds sweet tea. Why don't they have their other drinks for 99 cents. I guess I just like to drink, not alcohol but everything except plain water.
You will get your groove back. Until then, one day at a time. It is good you can laugh at yourself.
That silly cat......
Wonder what happened to your bathroom.
I hope you stay in your cute little house and don't move back into the other.
This morning it started storming......I thought, seriously, why can't you rain in Texas. I love rain and don't want to wish it away, but geez.....you need it.
Big (((((HUGS)))))
No no silly Debby I said I can't KEEP up with you guys not put up...hahaha You made me go back and reread this crazy post to make sure that is not what I said. hahahaha
Now I here watering running and I don't know where that is coming from so off here and see what I have left running
Love
Maggie
I feel the same way about Diet Cherry Pepsi. I was totally addicted to the stuff.
Unfortunately I developed some health problems and found they were caused by an allergy to Aspartame so I had to go cold turkey off the stuff.
Months later, I am still mourning the loss of my beloved diet cherry pepsi and still crave it every day.
What are they putting in these soft drinks to cause us to become so addicted to them?
My mom's husband is a Dr. Pepper fan, too. Or maybe I should say fanatic? (Like you, he tries to control the urge and keep himself to one a day.)
You post was funny, but on a more serious note, I did want to say that you are in an adjustment phase, so I hope you are cutting yourself some slack. Give it some time, and you will be functioning on all jets again.
I'm sure of it!
=)
My crack is Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi....I wont' even tell you how much of it I drink!
Maggie, I hope you know how much joy and laughter to bring to others through your writing!!!
Love you LOTS!
LuLu~*xoxo
I'm a closet Diet Coke fiend myself, but I so understand the need, especially in stressful times. Dear Maggie, my thoughts are with you! Life transitions are so very tough. Thank goodness for Dr. Pepper!
Sue beat me to commenting about Dick's addiction to Dr. Pepper. He used to drink a lot more of it than he does now. He had a pacemaker put in some time ago (actually he is on his second one)
and had to cut out on all caffeine so he had to switch to Caffeine free Dr. Pepper. It was difficult for him at first, but he is used to it now. He does limit himself to just one a day though because he is not supposed to have artificial sweeteners either. But he has one anyway. But you are so right, it can be very addicting.
I am concerned about your house and why you would need a new bathroom floor. Didn't he tell you why? Maybe he damaged it some way. If he does have to move, he SHOULD fix it if indeed he did damage it. I can certainly understand why you need to get as much rent as you can from your house.
Anyway, I hope that soon things will settle down for you and then you can get organized. Take a good rest though now, you need it!!
Hi again Maggie. I was wondering where your post went this morning when I left a comment. One minute it was there and the next, it was non existent.
I think that you need to switch from Dr Pepper to something more potent like beer to calm you down a bit and while your at it give some to that Thinkerbelle cat. On the other hand, I think that this post would make good fodder for a funny show like I love Lucy. ha, ha, ha...Hugs.
Renting to family can have it's problem obviously. Good luck with this.
JB
Diet Dr. Pepper is my drink. I call it "Nector from the God's". I can not go a day without it. I am so addicted. I have about 20 2 liter bottles out in the garage...LOL.. One of our grocery stores has them 10 for 10 this week and the 11th free. So I have done that twice...LOL.. Thanks for making me smile today. I needed it!!!
God Bless~
Debbie
Oh dear me what a state you are in...Thank goodness for me that I aint on the Dr.P...(Mary does like it though).. You sure havn't lost the art of writing thank goodness...and your descriptions, the story of the cat and all that followed had the tears...of laughter..running down my cheeks..
Just take your time Ma..one day at a time one day you will be all tidy and organised !! maybe !!!
hope the bathroom at the flat in town gets sorted out..or you will have to sort him out
Love Sybil xx
After reading this post, NOW I NEED A DR. PEPPER...and I don't drink the stuff! LOL My goodness, after everything you've been going through, one couldn't blame you if you started drinking the hard stuff! hehe I'm not a pop drinker, will only have a root beer once in a blue moon. I'm addicted to bottled water, though, have one with me at all times:-)
Aaaarrggghhh...now I have that Dr. Pepper song in my head! lol xoxo
Oh my, am I thirsty! My hubby would be the first to tell you that diet drink anything is the worst thing for your body! But I love diet pepsi and I really try to limit it to about 2 a month...drinking water is my goal! Hang in there and you'll come to your senses...it will just take some time to find out what you can or want to do and then I know you'll get it done girl! First, I'd take a trip and visit your rented house...see what the heck is going on...
HEY....I'd lost touch with you.
SO glad I saw you pop up
(somewhere else) so I could find
my way back to your funny place:)
grinning and grateful I am!
I'm a pepper too,
Jennifer
I have the same problem but mine is diet Coke! lol
I took the 12 step cure and am cola free. You would be surprised how many hours it frees up in your day when you quit:))
Could your nephew get a roommate to help with the rent? Also, you need to check out that strange bathroom statement he made.
Post a Comment