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Monday, December 13, 2010

Ms. Pearl Again!




You must visualize this story I am about to share with you because there was not time for pictures and lets pray together that no one from the road got any shots of Pearl either. I am sorry but I had to share some more Walmartian pictures. Sad Wal Mart is the only place to shop in this small town.

Last night after Gretchen and I volunteered for the arrival of Santa at the local library we went back to my house for a big bowl of homemade chicken soup and of course cornbread. Well while I was making the cornbread Gretchen ran over to her house to put her PJ’s on because we decided it was going to be one of those girly nights with pajamas and a girly movie. I decided instead of my regular pajamas I would give my mother’s old granny gown a try and to make Gretchen laugh when she returned back to the house. Well laugh she did but how cozy that gown was since it dipped into the 20’s last night. lol

Anyway the closer to the end of the year I always realize how unhealthy I have ate over the year so I change my ways for a few months. This morning I actually was enjoying a healthy breakfast of oatmeal still dressed in my granny gown. Before I could take my second bite I heard this heart wrenching scream from a cat underneath my house. I ran to the front door and there were my two Tom cats Pretty Boy and Casanova waiting to be fed so I was glad it was not one of them. I knew then it had to be the little new stray female that had wondered to the ole farm house a month ago. Pretty little thing and I have tried finding her a home because two Tom cats are enough for me outside.

The way she was screaming I just had to help her if I could so forgetting about being in my granny gown I ran outside and found the opening going underneath the house and a dang Black cat that belongs to the cowboy next door to me was yes raping that poor baby. Made me sooooooo mad Ms Pearl came out. She tried everything with her big mouth to help but the stupid black cat knew I guess she was safe under the house. Considered getting my gun but knowing that the chances of not just hitting the black cat was one in a million so after screaming her fool head off Ms. Pearl grabbed the water hose with the sprayer on the end and turned it on high.

It helped scare the black cat home but left me just furious. The poor female came out later and I fed her. Of course she had scratches on her face. I have never killed a animal or man but it will be tempting the next time I see the black cat.

Also after it was all over with I realized how stupid I must have looked outside for the world to see an ole lady running around with a granny gown on. Just hope all the people driving by knew it was Ms. Pearl and not Maggie.  Never have I worn the thing before but when I do I parade around the yard screaming like the cat underneath the house. Back into hidding again for the granny gown and Ms. Pearl.

Hope your breakfast was quieter than mine and you are having a good day.



Love to all

Maggie


28 comments:

blueviolet said...

You are so sweet to try to help that poor little animal!

For the record, I wore granny gowns for years until my kids put a stop to it about 2 years ago. I'm still mad! LOL

Brynwood Needleworks said...

Maggie:
I'm sitting here laughing my fool head off! I can just see you in your gown, butt up as you hose down the neighbor's tom. Swear to God...almost wet myself!

Glad it was warm enough for you to be able to spray the hose! It's blowing and cold here, but thankfully nothin's freezing. Good thing the wind was blowing hard there, or the neighbors might have had quite the peep show!

xoxo
Donna

GerryART said...

Only you, Maggie !
Happy Holiday Hugs

Kim said...

Oh dear lord - I snorted out loud. Maggie, you are just too darn funny. It may take awhile to get this image out of my head but when you grabbed the hose.....I amlost fell off my chair!

Jo said...

Maggie, I love you...! You always make me laugh. I haven't had time to visit my favorite blogs lately, and whenever I visit yours, I know I am in for a treat.

Cheers!

Jo

P.S. I love, love, love my cotton flannel granny gowns and my big fluffy slippers. Heaven on earth...!

The Paper Princess said...

OH Maggie

I shivered in anticipation when I saw that Ms Pearl had made another appearance and as always, she did not disappoint! You are marvelous and your counterpart is a hoot! I am waiting to see photos of Ms Pearl in action turn up on your NEIGHBOR'S blog - "did you see what that hose-tooting, granny-gown wearing neighbor of mine was up to today" - lol! I'm so glad I do my best to stay out of any store that ends in a "mart"! :-)

Have a wonderful holiday season, dear friend!

Ramona
http://create-with-joy.blogspot.com

~ Regan said...

Really? WHY do ppl go out in public like this?? (Im talking of the wally world photos, not you and your 'granny' gown! LOL) A goat? Geezumcrow...

That poor little kitty, hopefully she'll stick around long enough to get some good food in her belly, before she's off to a better home.

Debby said...

I love granny gowns..........glad Ms. Pearl went after that Tom cat. Poor baby kitty.
You keep that neighborhood under control. (((((HUGS)))))

yaya said...

If a video shows up on Youtube of some lady in a granny gown I guess we'll know the true story behind it! Look on the bright side, you burned off calories running, screaming and spraying. Day not wasted! You're a hoot girlfriend!

Sharon said...

I must say that you sure did give me a good laugh for Monday.
I am happy you saved that poor little kitty.
I will have that image of your granny gown in my head the rest of the day and chuckle.
Hugs

Rae said...

OMG That was hilarious. I am so glad I found your blog. I am now hooked and will have to follow to hear more of your adventures

Julie Harward said...

I think you are going to start to appear on youtube very soon! Or a stand up comedian, or in your case maybe it would be best to sit! ;D

acorn hollow said...

I can picture you with just your feet sticking out from under the house with that night gown on. Gramma got run over by a reindeer. ha
love it
cathy

Susan said...

I'm glad it was a LONG granny gown, or you might have looked like one of those Walmartians and someone would have called the cops on you when you were looking under the house! You ALWAYS make me laugh; thank you. I need it today.
Hugs
Susan

Donna said...

My side aches from laughing...thanks! The mental pictures are just too much fun! I'd have wanted to kill that cat too but think of it this way...next spring you'll have a whole passel of kittens to play with!! You'll have to get a sexy new nighty for Xmas to recue them with by then....

Sue said...

I can just see you running to the rescue in your granny gown! Good for you...er...Ms. Pearl.

;)

Marydon said...

WE BOTH are ROFLOL, Maggie. Those pics are sumpthin' else! I can picture you, too ... you are hysterical! Now how soon will you be a 'granny'? Chuckle!

LMTY about Sherry & the surprise trip ... c'mon over ... blushingrosetoo.blog. She was sooo cute, Maggie ... should be posted i a couple minutes. Great trip ... I gave her your hug ...

Have a lovely winter's eve, sweetie ~
Hugs of love, Marydon

My Grama's Soul said...

Oh dear lady.....you ALWAYS make me laugh....Hopefully if Miss Pearl ventures into WAL MART she will have sense enough not to wear bikini panties and a mini-skirt and do a big bend over for all the world to see.

(O:(O:

Xo

Jo

nancy huggins said...

Poor little kitty and obviousely you will now be adding to the cat population if she has kittens..I am an avid animal lover but would have felt the same way you did. The only one that would have seen me if I ran outside in a gown would be my LL across the road..I am lucky though since I sleep in sweats and sweat shirt and no one would know they are my jamies :) :)

Cat Nap Inn Primitives said...

I am so glad you helped that poor kitty..and I bet you look adorable in your granny jammies.:) I am in mine constantly..even went down to the post office in them today..just don't care..I hope you have a very merry christmas too..I have 2 more packages to send out and then I am done..I hope yours is bright and shiny new year!!!:)

Sares said...

I just love your stories! That black cat better steer far far away from Ms. Pearl or next time he's likely to get more than a wet hose!
Those Walmart photos are a hoot. Do these people not own a mirror!

Stephanie ~ Angelic Accents said...

Oh my gosh, you had me giggling pretty good here tonight!! Poor kitty, poor Ms. Pearl! Hope you live in a secluded area!! :0)

Happy Holidays!

Big TX Hugs,
Stephanie
Angelic Accents

janjan said...

Nowt wrong with granny gowns. Not that I ever wear them - more the pink/purple flanny jami's with bananas and monkeys on them kinda gal, (well they go with my gorilla slippers. I'd forgotten it was bin day, off I trotted down the driveway - no one would be out that early in the morning surely. Yeh, right, I wasn't the only one who had forgotten it was bin day and he was in very bright boxers only ( guess he thought no-one would be around that early as well). We were both caught in the headlights of a passing car. What a sight we must have looked.

How about getting one of those high-powered water pistols for the cat.

Hugs

Jan

Arkansas Patti said...

That image is just too funny. Did you get a rape kit? Your boys must be fixed or it would have been a gang rape.
I do not want to come back a female cat. They never sound like it is any fun.
Remember, she is no longer just a cat, she is most likely carrying 6 little black babies. Good luck.

Marydon said...

Finally got it up, Maggie ~
Love ya! Marydon

Tam said...

Thank goodness for the female and Black stray that you considered what might happen if you fired a shot at them. lol
Now that is a picture I want on here is you with your gun and wearing your granny gown.
Too funny maggie
I showed this one to the hubby and he laughed on his way out the door for work. haha
Got to go
Merry Christmas
Tam

A Tale of Two Cities said...

I bet that gown sure is 'purty'.....

Debi

Nezzy said...

Heeehehehhe! This is soooo me! I just throw on the old barn boots with anything I might have on to take care of any business that goes on 'round here and have actually stopped to laugh at myself! This was a hoot my dear!

God bless ya'll :o)