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Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Grandmayellowhairs Magazine Second Copy!

Brenda at  Cozy Little House agreed to help me out with my latest project on here. She has written a story for all of us to get to know her better.




So this is supposed to be about me. I’m trying to think what you might want to know about me.

I’ve been at this blogging thing for over two years now. I started my first one the last day of 2007. I used my name in the title of that blog. And while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, I didn’t like that I’d done that after awhile. And I was kind of tired of having to pay monthly for Typepad. So I started a blog geared toward gardeners, and switched to Wordpress.com. That was all well and good. And it was free. But I had the unfortunate habit of straying off course to crafts and decorating. Which probably didn’t bother some. But I’m sure the die-hard gardeners inwardly groaned.

So finally I started Cozy Little House. I don’t know why I chose that name. I was looking around my house, trying to come up with something apt. And it just came out of left field. I checked, it was available with Blogger, and I took it. That was nearly a year ago. I like Blogger. You can’t match its easy customization features. So I figured this one was meant to be.
I talk about my personal life from time to time. Inevitably at times I wish I hadn’t. But then, I’ll get an email from a stranger telling me that they’ve been through something very similar, yet they can’t seem to talk about it. Or can’t bring themselves to write about it. And I guess that makes it worthwhile. I know I like to read about all aspects of someone’s life. Because life isn’t just about having “pretty little pictures on the wall.” It’s about good and bad things and all matters in between.
I’ve talked about dealing with lifetime depression, and how that’s affected my daily life. So I won’t go into that here.

I had my first daughter at 17. And of course, the boy I thought would be there forever suddenly wasn’t. Actually it was a planned pregnancy. I don’t know if that makes me sound very immature or possibly just naive. We wanted to get married, and weren’t old enough. When girls got pregnant, usually someone would step up and put their John Hancock on a legal paper . And you could call the preacher, and then live happily ever after in wedded bliss. Or so I thought. Ha! It actually took me a year to get pregnant. Can you imagine? You would have thought I’d have been properly fertile at that tender age!

To my utmost surprise, by that time he’d already found himself a second girlfriend. And guess what? Now she was pregnant. Not only that, but she was my best friend’s cousin. After I had my baby and went back to school (back then you could stay home for the duration and make up your schooling once the baby was born), I had to sit in class with his pregnant wife. She had a daddy who worked the railroad, and I’m sure there wasn’t much question about whether they were properly married.

There I was taking care of a baby that had two surgeries by the time she was fifteen
months old. And making up two years in one so I could still graduate with my class. Class of 1975.

Lesson 1 for me: Boys will indeed be boys. That one was a perfect stranger two years my senior when he started pursuing me. That rascal wooed me and sent me roses and put me on a pedestal. Never having had a father or central male figure in my life, I was just enthralled.

Karma reached out and bit that boy on the butt however. His marriage to my best friend’s cousin (how awkward is that?) scarcely lasted more than a year. The girl’s parents ended up raising their baby daughter. And life went on.

You know, I’ve made many mistakes in my life. Some real doozies. But my daughter’s father didn’t come to realize that he wanted to be in her life until she was heading into adulthood. By then, it’s often too late to form any sort of real bond. He seems to go in and out of her life. She’s 35 now. She’s polite to him, but very reticent, and I don’t blame her. He will always be on the outside now looking in. Which makes me feel kind of sorry for him. Yet he’s on his fourth marriage and fourth set of kids, so I guess he’s not too miserable!

I ended up going on to college, eventually graduating with a journalism degree. I married one of my professors when I was 20. He was about 13 years my senior, so it was sort of doomed. He adopted my first daughter, and we had a second.
Blogging was quite the catalyst for me. As I tend to be somewhat of a loner, I could have friends and communicate on my own comfort level. It opened up a whole new world

I became more confident. And I discovered something I probably never would have otherwise. I found that I had a real fascination with photography. I learned that with a camera in hand, I could go out into nature and become mesmerized by texture and nuance and color.

That old adage is true: Take time to stop and smell the roses. Truly, don’t just pass by those roses and give them a glance and lean down momentarily and sniff them. Stop whatever you’re doing, wherever you’re headed, and really see and smell them. Indulge your senses.

I now spend much of my time in my garden with the pets when I’m not writing my blog or reading others. I listen to the birds chirp at the feeders, the wind chimes sounding in the breeze.
My life is a far cry from what I did earlier in adulthood. Which was investigative journalism. Small time. Nothing big. But the stories were heartrending. I’ve written about some of them on my blog. Mostly crimes against children. I often think of these dead or kidnapped children when I’m out in my garden. Sometimes the facts or faces will find a trail back to me. Digging in the dirt, I like to pretend I care for their memories there. To keep them from being forgotten. Not just be some statistic and a long ago newspaper story.

I am living my life, the second portion of it, smelling those roses every single day that I can. And blogging about it on a regular basis.

Brenda Kula http://cozylittlehouse.com/

Brenda and Nola  from At the Alamo! Thats a blogsite not the real Alamo...lol












Thank you so much Brenda for taking the time to do this for me. I can not tell you enough how much I appreciate you. This is a great story and I truly believe all of you have great stories so join me like Brenda and Susan have and tell us your story! Remember it does not have to be about you if you would prefer to tell just a story then email me grandmayellowhair@gmail.com....

Still trying to figure out the prefect title for these post....Appreciate all you funny comments about my morning with the Tom Cats! Whoa that was really crazy...now I have to replace the screen on the door....

I have added some wonderful giveaways on my sidebar so check them out. Also remember mine closes soon.
Love to all
Maggie

29 comments:

Diane at Crafty Passions said...

I have been blogging with Brenda now about 2 years, she is a sweet sensitive creative person.I wish we lived closer because I would drop by her cosy little house often.
I suggest everyone drop by her blog she is a genuine sweet person!
Diane

Nola said...

Sorry, that's not Brenda's cousin, it's me! I thought I had clicked onto the wrong blog when Brenda's photo came up! Haha! We met through blogging 2 years ago, along with Diane from Crafty Passions and we've all become great friends. I live 90 minutes from Brenda so I can go visit; unfortunately, I'm about 90 hours from Diane!

sjmcdowell said...

Dear Brenda,
Your story touched my heart. You are a Great Lady in my book. I understand a bit of what you have been through, maybe that will be in my next story!! I believe the Lord has a mission for all of us and our stories can help those that may not know what to do or where to go sometimes.
Thank you Maggie for having this open forum and letting us let our hair down and pull closer to one another. God Bless all...Love Susan

Nola said...

It's me again. After I thought about it, I kinda like being Brenda's cousin, so I think I'll keep the title if it's okay.
Brenda, loved your story!
Your loving cousin, Nola

Anonymous said...

Maggie and Brenda....
Whoa! I really enjoyed a appreciated your life story. I graduated from HS in 1974 and can identify with some of the times, and how you were innocent of life at that time! A different world. Well I looked at Cozy Little House and my socks were blown off! What a beautiful home and garden you have!!! And I love your animals!!! God bless both of you for sharing your lives with us! There are more of us out there that can identify with 'stuff'! ♥♥♥

Grandma Yellow Hair said...

Sorry Nola I went and changed it. Glad you brought it to my attention..
Isn't this a great story...Thanks Brenda
Love
Maggie
I forgot to mention I think Marydon is my next story teller...

Linda @ Itsy Bits And Pieces said...

Thanks Maggie, for sharing these stories and thank you Brenda for telling your story!

Sharon said...

Maggie, your idea of posting stories is very interesting and Brenda, I enjoyed reading your story! So many have similar experiences in their early life. I'm much older than you, still life is life no matter what era you live. Now, I'm headed over to Cozy Little House to look around. See you there.
Sharon

Nezzy (Cow Patty Surprise) said...

This is fun. I enjoyed reading about Brenda's life and seeing her pictures. I'm gonna go check her out, not in a weird stalking way but pop over to her blog.

Thanks for introducing us to others. God bless and have a wonderful day, sweetie!!!

Caddie said...

Wonderful post Maggie. Thank you Brenda for sharing your story with me. I put you in favorites for future perusal

Maggie, Just tell me the cost for a batch of fudge. I would like to order 2 pounds! I could never be so lucky to win a sniff...

Vicki/Jake said...

Good idea for sure Maggie...Got a name figured out yet?? how about *Let's Just Talk* or something...anyway, glad to hear you're doing better Brenda. I think you'd be surprised how many of us can relate to your story. Now I'll go visit your blog and see what everyone is talking about!
Thumbs up Maggie!

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

I love this idea of letting bloggers tell their stories and Brenda has found a special place in my heart. I felt like I had found a long lost friend when I read her blog. We all have a past and she has been so open in sharing her story with all of us. I really admire her for that. She helps us remember what's important in our lives now and I like that! Thanks for posting her story! ♥

Libbie said...

Hey Brenda...wow you sure have been through a lot! I am so proud of you for raising your daughter on your own! I am sure you have plenty more stories about that! One of my favorite quotes is "Easy lives make for boring stories." Thanks so much for sharing yours.

Mimi Sue said...

I too love Brenda and her Cozy Little House. Although I've only known her and her blog for a few weeks. It's so interesting to get to know other bloggers a little better. Mimi

Welcome to the Garden of Egan said...

Thanks for sharing her story and letting her blog.
Good stuff. It's nice to see how others overcome and become more.

Tammy@T's Daily Treasures said...

Hi again Maggie! I love these true life stories. It's so amazing how just through blogging, we already feel like we've known each other for years. Your postings help us to know each other even better. It's so nice to put names with faces and stories. Thanks for sharing! Brenda is lovely and has the cosiest little house ever. Many blessings, Tammy

Jo said...

Something Brenda said touched a chord with me. I tend to be a loner too. My mother always told me the thing she noticed about me is that I don't "suffer fools gladly". However, in the past three years that I have been blogging, I have met some wonderful, interesting people, and every day I meet more. Today I have met two -- Ms. Pearl :-) and Brenda. And the one thing I have noticed about blogging is that, the more different we are, the more we are the same. Does that make any sense?

Thank you, Brenda, for sharing your story. It's very similar to mine. I was a mother at 19, and my husband -- who was a pilot -- died in a plane crash when I was 23. I raised my daughter on my own and she now has a Master's degree in Speech Language Patholgy. I understand what a brave woman you have been. Kudos to you!

The Strawberry Mallard said...

You have NOT made mistakes ~ you have been given lessons, learned from them, and grown...and that is the nice part about being in the third age of life....you have the wisdom you wish you had in the first and second.
Cheers to you for having endured all that you have and being kind enough to share it with us all!
Hugs, Nancy

simona said...

thanks for sharing these stories ...
Love your banner.
hugs from Italy.
simona

Kissed by an Angel said...

Hi Maggie, It was a great idea to ask these wonderful women to share their stories!! It's great to get to know our Blog neighbour better!!! Brenda - thank you so much for sharing that with us!!!
Bless you both!!
xxxx

Janean said...

it just goes to show that we see a beautiful "well-put-together" gal and just assume her life has been easy or fun.... thank you for your honest and being transparent.

(((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

I'm truly amazed by the honesty that this post was written. I applaud you. We all have stuff that we carry, especially from our youth and you have put pen to paper to make all of us feel better. Thank you.

Auntie Cake said...

Wow Brenda has an amazing story. How incredible that she was able to find time to finish college while raising a baby on her own. And I love her gardens!
Kate

~ Regan said...

NIce to meet you, Brenda! Going over to Cozy Little House now...

Bunnym said...

How 'bout "Maggie's Blogging Magpies" for your title? Anyone who can go back to school after having kids is alright with me...way to go Brenda!

tootles,
bunny

Unknown said...

WOW what a wonderful life story. We all go thru our struggles and mistakes, i have plenty of it. Thank you for sharing....
www.lechateaudesfleurs.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

G'morn, Maggie ~ What a lovely write by Brenda ... her heart & life before us to share. She did a splendid write ... TY Brenda ... those roses should never be passed, just stoop, sniff & enjoy! as they lift your spirits.

I will visit Brenda, as we haven't met yet.

Magazine Title suggestion ~ Roses & Memories.

Hugs, Marydon

Unknown said...

I'm on my way to cozy litte house.

Maggie, what a terrific idea you have come up with!

Carole Burant said...

How lovely to meet Brenda! She really did go through quite a lot in her life but I always say that things happen for a reason and I think we grow and learn from those mistakes which she seems to have done:-) I`m really loving finding out about the real people behind the blog. Such a great idea you had!!! xoxo