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Sunday, March 11, 2012

Roy Where Are You!

Tinkerbell woke me at three this morning wanting to be fed and so here I am wide awake thinking of you. Hope you are well and that you remembered to change your clocks. It just dawned on me that it was not four in the morning but actually five.

First before I go any farther I want to thank you for your sweet caring comments, phone calls and emails. I am trying to be strong but when it comes to my kids then I find it much harder to deal with that if it is myself. We are still waiting on more test results for my son but I know with all your prayers that he is going to fine. So from the bottom of my heart Thank You!

A few post back I wrote you about my working with a lady in the Mail Room who later ended up in prison herself for murder. Well this morning I want to tell you about my getting hired on at the prison in Texas.

When you apply for any position at the Texas Department of Criminal Justice your paper work lands on several different desk before actually landing in the hands of the department you applied. I had no idea that if your selected for a job interview that you go before a TDC Board which usually consist of five or more people from that Unit.

The morning I first walked into that prison I had no idea what was waiting on me behind those guarded walls with razor wire strung completely around the unit.

After going through the security of the main gate I was told where to go and wait for someone to take me to the job interview. It was intimidating but not near the intimidation I felt when I walked inside the room where five men and one woman were sitting. In the middle of the room was a man behind this enormous desk with a empty chair in front of it where I was ask to sit.

He introduced his self as Warden so and so which I missed the Warden title all together and then he went around the room introducing me to a Major, Captain, Lt and so on. I immediately thought they had sent me to the wrong interview because I was going up for a clerical job not some big position.

Little did I know at the time that this was how all positions were processed and before you went up for these positions you had better do your homework because these guys don’t fool around. Their there to see how well you know the job your going up for and if you did your homework.

Well know one told me this when I applied for this position which was in Human Resources. What the other applicants knew that I did not was you visited the unit before this interview and pick up study material.

Needless to say I winged my way through their bombardment of questions and most answers I am sure were not what they were looking for but I did my best.

Then this man behind the desk who I had no clue was a Warden asked me the final question. He said, “How would you handle working for an old man who was hard to get along with, gripes all the time and yells a lot?” I answered, “Well if you don’t bother me I won't bother you!”

This man behind the desk brought down his hand on that desk so hard and screamed, “Hell I wasn’t talking about my self!”
Dumb Maggie said, “Well who were you talking about!”  He points to a Lt. that was sitting almost behind me rolling almost out of his chair in laughter. I then noticed all the ranks were laughing their fool heads off.

I did not get that job but a week later that Lt. called and offered me a mail room position where I ask does this mean I have to go up before all those men again. He assured me that No they were hiring me from that board. Haha

Turns out this Warden five years later got me through one of the toughest times in my life. I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. I have never told many people what I am writing here this morning but I honestly believe that if it had not been for this man I would not be sitting here today as a Cancer Survivor.

The day after I was told I had cancer I walked into the unit not knowing that my Major had already told the Wardens of what I was facing. Each day before I reported to my job I visited with the ladies in the front office for maybe ten minutes. I walked into that office and they all said hello and then one by one left the room leaving me with this Warden who was sitting at one of their desk.

He motioned me to sit at another desk and I did. For the next ten minutes or longer he never took his eyes off of mine and we sat there looking at each other with tears in our eyes. It was so strange. Neither one of us speaking which if you knew the history of him and I it was usually a lot of yelling back and forth but not this day. He just sat there I know now he did not know what to say to me.

Finally I stood up to walk out of the room because I had to get to work and he said, “Stand up straight and hold your head up. Don’t ever let me see you with your head down.”

Walking to the back to start my day I thought what just happened? In the months to follow I was told no one could ask him about me and how I was doing because he would not talk about it.

He was there for me through all my treatments and tried his best to get me to take time off. I knew I was stronger being around him so I came to work every day. The last week of treatments I guess I looked really bad because when I walked into that front office to visit with my friends like I did every day he came into the room and screamed like he always did but this time telling me to go back home. I refused and he escorted me to my car. He told me to go home go to bed for the rest of the day and not to show back up for a week. I was of course fighting him all the way to my car but once I got home and in bed I knew that he had saved me.

Actually I did not realize until years later this man was the reason I got up every day went to my treatments and then drove to work.

Now I need him again. Roy where are you, I need you!

Love to all

PS> This is the only picture of Roy that I have that was taken at a Birthday party for my boss. He was sitting to the left of me and my friend Sharon to the right. The idiot leaning over my neck was the Captain. I must of said something dumb because before I knew it he was over behind me acting like I guess he was blowing up a Blonde doll. Who knows?


LuLu Kellogg said...

You need to write a book Maggie!!

Sending prayers for your son!


Cathy said...

What a powerful story!!! We really need that special someone pushing us and movitativing us to keep moving and care for ourselves!!! I pray the LORD provides you with a Roy to get through your worries!!!


acorn hollow said...

Maggie where have I been that I missed posts? I can not find the post about your son but I will tell you this. The power of prayer that ripples through these blogs are amazing. I am keeping you and your son in my prayers.

Theanne said...

Prayers for your son!

Where ever Roy is I'm sure the same spirit that helped you through once before is there to help you through again...remember his words, “Stand up straight and hold your head up. Don’t ever let me see you with your head down.”

Kathy @ Creative Home Expressions said...

Well, I have tears in my eyes at this post, Maggie! It sounds like he really cared for and about you. I'm sure that, probably for the first time in his life, he had no words to say, but could let you know how he felt by sitting with you like that. Sometimes those yellers are the most loving and caring people. I worked for a lawyer like that in my early years of working, but I think only I knew that he was just a big old teddy bear!

Shirley said...

My Dear Sweet Maggie, I cried this morning for you and me. Prayers are a very strong medicine and believe me they truly help. The friends in blog land will all pulling for you and your son. I want you to know that I am sending you long distance hugs and prayers if I could I would do it in person. Take care of yourself. Hugs from Your Missouri Friend.

Country Wings in Phoenix said...

Good Morning Maggie Sweetie...
I so enjoyed reading this write this morning. I have told you before and I will tell you again, you NEED to write a book. You my dear have so many words to share on the pages of a book. Yes you do.

I will be sending up some heavy prayers for your dear son sweet one. God is watching over him,knows what his needs are, and we know he is listening to us as we ask.

Hugs to you dear friend and so much love, Sherry

Tracy said...

Little do you know, my friend that Roy IS with you...each and everyday holding your hand and cheering you on every step of the way...I just know he is!
I will be thinking of you and praying for you and your son. I can't imagine knowing how it feels to go through what you are experiencing but keep writing and deep allowing others to help you through.
love and hugs...

Sue said...

Good friends are always with us, aren't they? I'm glad that you can reach back for those times when Roy saw you through your own painful struggle.

Maybe we can be your Roy this time, Maggie. I know how many prayers are said each day in your behalf...and your son's. I hope you can remember in the darkest hours that the Lord is aware of both of you. He knows and will serve your needs.

Sending hugs, too.


Olga said...

You have had your share of hardships and struggles, it sounds like, but also enough angels around to help you through each time. (Maybe Roy would choke to be characterized as an angel.) Another one will come along this time as well. I'm sure of that.

A Tale of Two Cities said...

God places just the right person in our lives at the perfect time. I"m so thankful he was there for you when you were going through a valley. I'm sure you'll, in turn, be that person for someone else some day when you are needed.

Bill S. said...

I keep telling you that you need to write a book. Put me on the list.

Wonderful strong story that brings back memories to me.

Sybil said...

Oh Ma if only I could magic Roy to appear I would but as I aint a magician best I can do is lend you my shoulders and even a real hard stare if that's what is needed..If that aint any help we know someone who is ALWAYS around us night and day..don't we...
Love always dear grandmayellowhair !
Love Sybil xxx

yaya said...

Maggie, you always manage to amaze me. What a great story and what a great man to be there for you. I will continue to keep you and your son in my prayers. Your story reminded me of one I had when I was 19. My doctors thought I had ovarian cancer and I was scheduled for a total hysterectomy. I worked in surgery and there was one doc who had everyone always shaking in their boots. For some reason he and I got along fine. When he saw my name on the surgery schedule he went to my Mom (who worked in the swtichboard) and told her that if I needed anything that she should come to him. She was was I..when he did this. Sometimes you just don't really know a person's true self until something like this happens. My surgery turned out fine and I didn't have cancer..God does hear and answer prayers and sometimes he sends us just regular folks to be angels for us. I know you have many of those special folks in your life.

Gorges Smythe said...

Hi Maggie:

I've been pressed for time and having problems both with one of my computers and my service provider, so somehow, I missed or forgot the news about your son. You all will be in my prayers from here on out though.

Arkansas Patti said...

You have so many of people in your corner Maggie sending you support and prayers.
I pray not only for your son to be well but that there is someone close by like Roy who will let you lean on them during this rough time. It takes strength to allow ourselves to lean on another while catching our breath.

chancythegardner said...

We are all here for you sweet Maggie and sending up prayers for your son, you and your family. I cried reading this and was hoping Roy would show up at your door to comfort and encourage you. Hugs

Julia said...

Hi Maggie, thanks for another great life story. No need to spend a penny to be entertained with your incredible True Stories. I remember when I was younger I used to buy a magazine called True Stories.

You are always so entertaining and your life is so unusual. You are quite the gal.

I've been keeping your son Clint in my prayers every day. The waiting seems endless sometimes. I hope that someone will come along to be your rock again like Roy was.
Big Hugs, Julia

Tam said...

Dear Maggie
What dear friends God has given you especially with Roy and all of your friends out here in blog world.
I read everyone's comment to you and they all left you such beautiful words and we all do care what you are now going through. Like you when it comes to my kids then I am totally different. I can handle my own trials but not ones that effect my children.
Even though their all grown and moved away our heart strings just grow too.
You have seen the poem I am sure about how different people come into our lives for different reasons. I see that is what happened with your Warden friend. He probably loved you so much he did not have the words to tell you how he felt about you having cancer. I think that happens to us when we are dealing with something serious with our loved ones we tend to not know what to say.
Would love to hear more stories about him. I have a feeling you could entertain us with pages because if he hit his desk and said Hell I wasn't talking about myself then he had to have given you lots of funny experiences while the two of you worked together.
I know it is not the same since I only keep up with you on here and a few emails but you can let all of us be your Roy. He is probably a hard case to follow but we all love you too.
I find it funny that no one mentioned this terribly funny picture of you at this party. The big smile on his face and your friend tells it all. I can just imagine the look on your face. haha
Remember these good times and keep positive.
God will Heal your Son.

Paula said...

Hope you find Roy and prayers for your son.

Buttercup said...

Prayers that just the right shoulder to lean on appears to you. Hugs and more hugs, sweet friend!

joanne said...

you are such a great story/memory teller. Still praying..hold your head up my sweet friend.

Nezzy said...

What a wonderful story this was sweetie.

Don't we all need a 'Roy' in our life??

You've been on my heart and mind this weekend and know I've been prayin' for you and your family.

If ya can't find your 'Roy', you always have us sweetie!!!

God bless and have yourself a sunshiny kinda day my friend! :o)

jack69 said...

Great entry. Love the honesty. Thanks for dropping by the Shipslog.

Hope all goes well for you!

Sherry & jack

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

One day at a time, sweetie.....



Donna said...

It says a lot...that 10 minutes of silence. I think he cared in an unspeakable way that translated in a feeling of respect which it appears was mutual.
I love to read your stories Maggie. I could read you all day. Lately, I am working more and have little time to be on the computer. Many family things going on too which will never end up in my blog. It's a hard economy. And right now, I too, am not sure about health issues. Scary! I'll be praying for your son, I know how you must feel your children are your heart.
May tomorrow be better!

Theanne said...

Thank you for following my blog "yaya paints"...and for your kind a couple of brushes, some watercolors and watercolor paper...draw a sketch (or not) and paint!

Darlene said...

I am so sorry you are having such a bad time, Maggie. I just know things will get better for you and your son. My prayers are flying your way for you both. You do have many people out here that love and care for you, so use us to vent to, we can take it, and want so much for good things to happen to you and arae so willing to keep praying for you. This will work in the end, I promise you.

Sharon said...

I pray for you and your son.
I really did enjoy reading this.
Prayers and Hugs

Garden of Egan said...

That is a beautiful post Maggie. I don't know what is going on, but know that you are in my prayers.
Bring Roy to your mind and all the comforting encouraging words that he told you.

Hugs my friend.

Chatty Crone said...

Maggie - one of my longest and dearest followers is having a breast removed this am at 9am. What women of courage you both are. A powerful story - I sent it to my friend, but I guess she didn't write you yet. I sense there are other things going on now and you need someone. I hope and pray that you get what you need.

Love, sandie

Pat MacKenzie said...

What can I add...your strength comes through in your writing. How therapeutic is blogging! Continued prayers for you and your son and hoping for another Roy in your life when you need him most.

sjmcdowell said...

thinking of you dear Maggie!!
I really miss our talks. I know you have a lot going on in your life right now.
I am always here when you need me.

Love and Blessings,

Prayers never ceasing..


Sounded at first like you were on trial to even get into the job field. Scary. But the scary part came near the end when you told us how you survived cancer with the help of Roy. He made you strong and he made you hold your head up high!!!

Poignant post Maggie!!


Marydon said...

I know that God has His hand on Clint. Will be so glad when his Dr. appt. comes so we now all the details.

Love your story once again, Maggie. You do know how to recollect/recount your life experiences so fabulously!! We all tell you constantly ... WRITE A BOOK! Then we can all move down & live with you on the '40'. What a blast!!

I had to go back & read what I've been missing. That officer was the angel God sent you to carry you thru your cancer ... what a gem he is. I can only be grateful he was there for you every step of the way.

Sweetie, you know I forgot to call you back. Tenant is upset over the floor separating ... ummm, yah! Called previous owner but he's as dumb as an ox, threw out all his papers on the house & now the guessing game begins. Then they were upset that the crown molding caulking is separating from the ceiling etc. Welll, for pete's sake! Out here you turn the heat on in the winter & it'll do it every time. So had to get our workman up there & I told him, they aren't very happy with your work ... good thing he doesn't get too ruffled.

Will call you next week.

Have a beautiful eve, sweet sistah ~
Happy St. Paddy's Day ~
Hugs & Love from both of us ~

Gypsy Heart said...

You really should write a book! I know I'd buy it.


Create With Joy said...

I SO enjoyed your story - you always manage to make me smile, no matter what the circumstances!

Thanks for stopping by - have a beautiful week - you and your family are in my prayers!

Ramona :-)

Create With Joy said...

I SO enjoyed your story - you always manage to make me smile, no matter what the circumstances!

Thanks for stopping by - have a beautiful week - you and your family are in my prayers!

Ramona :-)